Remembering the young lady I was to who I have grown to be
now is literally something of a miracle for me.
Coming from a girl who once believed she was of nothing, hollow inside,
feeling of no love, feeling of no self-esteem, no confidence, walking life in a
shadow hidden from who ever walked by her path.
It’s so painful of a life to live and actually believe that is all your
life is of worth. Putting on endless of
make-up, doing hair for hours and hours, finding something perfect to wear but
even in that entire still I was not understanding how it was, how it truly
should be. I seen a video today that
truly broke my heart to see the worth that women truly thought was so low that
it was how their life should be. Women
wandering the streets taking the danger of their life riding in cars with
strangers not ever knowing what would be the outcome to make money for
addictions, for living, striving in a world they feel to be is the only way for
them. Hooking has come to the level of
awareness that it smacks you right in the face now of days, it is no longer a
secret or something that you do not see, it is there and it is more and more
every day that goes by.
Speaking of how it was before for me to how I am today
reminds me of just how many women go through their life with perceptions of their
worth that is really not of the truth of who they are due to lacking love,
confidence, low self-esteem, all things gathered to the scars of many things
happening as you grow by those that make you believe who you are by the evil
words said out of jealousy, anger, resentment whatever it may be, those
perceptions told to you so often eventually makes you feel that all of what is
said is true. How is it we allow others
to tell us what the value of our life is?
Where do we go wrong in listening to the evil of others that soon enough
we are broken and become what we are told?
How long do we truly live that low standard life we are so believed to
be true before we actually see ourselves with our very own eyes and love of
ourselves? Seriously women all around
the world need to find their love let go of the evil tongues of others to see
them true selves through the eyes of love for themselves, unchain the bonds of
the perceptions of the teasers, jealous, anger of so many and stand up to your
own self, your own love for self and truly see your standards are higher than
the skies.
Rejection of a man, that isn’t you, that is the eye of the
person before perhaps disillusioned in his own self-absorbed mind set, yet that
lays deeply on your mind breaking down yourself worth of who you feel you are. It
is once we start loving our own self, being true to the real us, knowing that
the love inside is what is value so much more than what you see on the outside
that we will really start to evolve in the woman we truly were meant to see and
be. Being comfortable in your own skin
added with the love of our own self and others is truly when the glow of you on
the outside shines with so much beauty and that is where you are truly seen to
others of the same mental capacity. Lowering
yourself to the lowest of standards is a crime violated to all of your being,
thinking your life is not of worth or can’t do any better are your own chains
tied down to who you are truly, locked up to those chains will forever be if
not for the eyes of love you see through.
We women have come so far in this life to let go of what magnificence that
lies within is a waste to a life gifted to this world. Looking around to see so many women living
that life of blindness makes me want to just scream. Where do you make the change? How do you make the change? Being the bright light for all and as many as
you can to help they find their way until they truly see their worth and love
in true vivid colors.
It all starts with the thinking of one person wanting to
change the world, yet once that light is shined so bright others see you, they
see you to shine with you onto others to get the picture, to allow others to
truly see life in the eyes of love, beautiful vivid colors. By setting the example of what it is you are
so strongly trying to beam to the world will soon be caught on and others will
shine their light with yours so others soon enough will see that light and wake
up. Be the example you want others to be,
that saying is the true meaning in life we live, be the teacher to what you
have been taught, these days are the days we need leaders to step up to their
heart and show so many that they too can fight the darkness and truly see who
they are, truly open their hearts to finally see the pureness of their own
self, their own self-worth, to understand their life is of importance for the
simple fact that they are here and breathing.
Yes perhaps when you see yourself in a mirror you don’t see the model on
TV or on the cover of vogue but understand loving you fully for who you are is
the beautiful of realness that shines outwards allowing people to see the
beauty of you from the heart. Love for
yourself and self-worth is truly where the model of you lies. Knowing that what you see on TV is not
beauty, it’s beauty purely on the outside like a painting that is beautiful but
has no inside, its beauty is for pure eye candy, not for self-worth, love, or
for what solely of what it is, the beauty is the painter that envisioned that
painting eyes wide of the beauty they seen through them onto the strokes of a
brush on a canvas.
We in some ways are the painter to our own self-portraits,
truly seeing the beauty from the inside bringing it out into the eyes of the self-worth
and love you carry. Too many woman are
lowering themselves to beliefs of what they see on TV or magazines or even
those that tell them who they are that it is crushing their hearts and all their
love they hold on the inside that they start to do things in the perceptions of
that low self-esteem, they see little of themselves so they feel life is not of
importance and not good enough that soon consumed in a life of how they feel
they act, they do. If you feel bad you
do bad, you see unworthiness of things that others achieve believing you could
never be of worth to the dreams of what you see others doing, thinking to
yourself that you’re so low that nothing is ever of worth to you or your life. When your standards become low the way of
your life becomes low, the dark cripples to you to the real thinking that once
was, it cripples you into believing your life is not meant to shine, it is of
not worth all of what you once dreamed of.
This is a topic so familiar to me, if you feel bad of who
you are you soon start to believe that you’re not worthy of good things, good
people, true love, everything of good turns bad. You start to believe that life is not worthy
of love, that the love you had is suffocated by the low self-worth you create. Where do you get in life being led by dark? You lose on what your life really has to
offer by following the dark, you start to do things that you feel who you are,
you start to believe that you’re so unworthy that not one good thing is there
for you, that all you do is walk around in circles aimlessly looking for
attention to feel loved and pretty in all the wrong places. For Women that
choose to prostitute? I do not ever
believe that is what a woman truly feels is what she should be doing; that the
darkness they feel on the inside is making them feel that is all they are good
for. How about those that feel they are
so invisible they take their own lives? Really
does all this need to be happening in this world? NO, yet we so blindly turn our heads in
pretending not to see it rather than help the situation, granted I know there
may be some that really do not want to change due to it being the only way they
know but it is not many I strongly believe.
For people who want to see a change and help I do know feel
the overwhelming burden of feeling you are only one, back that feeling with
actually doing something becomes a chain reaction where others see what it is
you do to learn to teach and help the next to the next to the next like a
domino effect. Yes you may be one but if
you reach out and shine so bright that light soon enough teaches onto others to
reach out to more people as well leaving it to soon more than just one
helping. Yet if you forever believe you
are just one person that can’t change the world is also a false belief to the
love that is backed by the grace of God that sees what it is you are trying to
do, that through that love it is spread like mad weeds onto so many hearts of
others taking the lead that once you thought could never be done. Be the chosen one to start the lead and see
there it multiplies. Leadership is
strongly needed in the times we live, led by the unconditional grace of God’s
love through you onto others and see how miracles are born. The one of you becomes 2 3 4 5 6 7 and endless
countless of others leading their ways. If
we forever turn our heads and ignore the things of importance how will we ever
teach what it is in our hearts we are made to teach, to share, to love.
I use to be that young lady following the shadow, but
through the unconditional love of God used through my husband passed onto me he
taught me just what it was I was worth, he seen that shaded part in me to be a
leader to teach me unconditional love to open my eyes to the love inside of me,
that I was here for more than just walking in shadows, to see in me the leader of
the purpose my life was graced with.
Here I am looking at myself with nothing on my face, hair undid, clothes
not so classy but yet seeing me with all the love of the inside to see my
outside of nothing more than blessed and beautiful gleaming a light so strong
that others have no choice to see that light and catch on. What you learn in life you teach onto others
that are lost, you do not walk eyes wide shut to the things that scare you, and
you walk with love and are a leader to those that need help to all the wisdom
you carry by what you have been through.
You see we are not walking this earth solely for no reason, you have to
find that reason, you have to painfully find that reason, debilitating lessons
of the reason you are miraculously put here on earth to be and do. Your life is of so much worth that if you
truly start to see it you will cry the ugly cry in knowing just how blessed
your specific purpose is. Once recognition
is seen, you are full force ahead climbing to the tallest steepest of every
mountain in your way helping those climb the climb hand in hand with you, so
they too can go onto others and climb the climb with them as well.
Oh Natural, bare, vulnerable, abundance, grateful, all are
traits you see when you see yourself bare, without make-up, without hair done
up, classy clothes, the bare you of nothing but the love you hold on the inside
that dresses you in beauty on the outside.
Being of all those traits is taking in the blessings of life allowing
the wondrous of life flow into your world, allowing you to understand to be in
service to God in the highest, powerful of love working through you onto every
person you can teach and help them to lead the path to what it is they are
blessed with in helping others in this world.
The nature we see outside is not dressed in anything but beauty as we to
shall be if we allow ourselves to grow with love. To be love, to take in that love and know all
of it is of worth, you are of worth. The
ugliness you feel is nothing more than the evil that lurks. Truly am blessed to as of now learning to let
God be in my life fully, to see that, to feel that, to see the miracle of that
is as though seeing life through eyes of a baby, natural, pure, untainted. Lessons learned lately in awe of just how
much we are being taught lessons to our life if only we take the time to hear
those lessons.
How were we all born?
Naked, pure, no clothes, natural and free, to see ourselves the day we
were born is to see how we truly are meant to be, that’s not saying we should
all walk around naked though haha, that’s to say the natural of us is just the
outside of what people see but backed with the strongest of love that beauty in
you shines, no matter what you wear, what you have on your face, it’s the natural
beauty of love that captures the hearts of others. Going deeper than what you see on the outer
exterior is really where the trueness lies in us all. “Don’t judge a book by its cover”, so true so
full of trueness this is a lesson I often find myself learning. Seeing past that rough, scary, unknown is a
lesson I recently learned to get through to the inside to see nothing but love
and people who truly want to change and be love was the greatest of lesson ever
taught to me before. I take that lesson
now to know that approaching the rough, scary, unknown things you see on the
outside is what will force you to see the love that it is on the inside. I’m so in love with the lessons taught to me
every day that the more and more I take in those lessons the stronger my
wholeness becomes. Stephen Dimmick your
quotes coming to mind and making me laugh as I type this “If you aren’t a nice
person, make-up won’t help”.
Be a leader, be a teacher show this world just exactly who
they are and who they can be, show this world that dreams are not just
something you do while you sleep, set examples and shine bright so others can
see and learn and do from what your beaming.
Show those that feel so low in their life that the skies the limit to
where they could be. Free the chains of
so many bonded to the perceptions of the darkness, let them know they can break
those chains. Be the authentic you; know
that no make-up, nothing makes you who you are nor more appealing to where you
need to go. The real, natural, loving
you full of the love and love of God is who you truly are and that you’re not
afraid to bare the true essence of your outer beauty to the world without even
flinching in what others may seem to think what you look like on the outside,
rejection is not what you are it does not make you, they know nothing of what
you hold on the inside. Rejection to of
things you do are not either the answer to your worthiness to what you deserve,
it is only a meaning in both ways of rejection that there is something greater
of significance to you out there in the world coming to your life soon.
To see yourself through others is not the way of truly who
you are, deflect that image to see the real you in the reflection looking back
at you. STOP degrading yourself worth of
the life you live by what you feel because of others, find your love, passion,
purpose and feel it, let it glow out of you and feel it full force to act upon
it. My favorite saying of all and has
helped me so much in life as I go through my roughest of times because
sometimes that young lady I was wants to creep back in when rejection, no’s and
negativity invades my space is “it is none of your business what others say or
think of you” ~Deepak Chopra~. Stop
letting others and failure dictating your worth and who you are to understand
the power of love and lessons in it all will always be open to every door you
want to get through, the more love you feel and give the more doors you will
open, the more of a leader you become paving your own path, showing others they
can do it to. To those that live so
engrossed in darkness those are the ones that are blinded to the light you try
to shine onto them and those are the ones that need your hand to be walked with
until they can finally be their own person and turn on their own light,
sometimes though sometimes we just have to understand darkness is darkness and
does not ever want to seek light.
Don’t feel bad for the ones you can’t help and smile and
look to the ones you have perhaps one day the ones you could not help will find
a way to where they should be. Bullies,
prostitution, drugs, violence, wars, all negative in this world needs leaders
to show what they know no different. If
you feel it is not possible think again because backed with the grace of God
there is not anything that cannot be done if only you understand, feel and do
it. If a door to where you need to be is
closed kick it open because there isn’t anything going to stop you to where you
are destined to be. Truly see who you are in the natural to
understand what you see is how you feel on the inside, no make-up, hair do,
fancy clothing will make you feel better about you if the inside is shattered
and hollow.
I cannot believe today that I feel so comfortable in my oh
natural being that it makes me cry in understanding finally that it is not what
is seen on the outside but what you have on the inside. The young lady in me screams at me for baring
all but I laugh in knowing she was a shell of who I truly was for way too long,
I give thanks to my husband passed, the love of God, and the deep to the heart
lessons of my father passed that help me see and grow to the wholeness of me
every single day. If only you all knew
of me to know just how deep it is to do what I did today you probably would
understand just how grateful and full of joy I am today to truly carry love for
myself and love for others finally in this life I’m living. Sometimes our small hurdles are the biggest
ones to us, and in the small it only gets bigger and bigger from here on.
NOTE TO ALL: You are
not your failures, rejections, the bad mouthed of others, your worth is not of
what others say you are, or the failures you go through, those failures and bad
mouthed people are your lesson to the evolving door that brings in the bad and
good into your life that you see fit you want in your life, it’s in that
evolving door you get to kick out what it is you do not need, and keep the
things of great significance to the life your building. Failures, rejections, negativity, all of
these things can be sculpted into a love of a lesson by you if you allow your
heart to be. Feeling and living a life
of low self-worth is your creation and you strongly need to step up to your
heart and understand that is not the life you deserve and build to the shinning
of life you so greatly deserve.
Real life and upfront where you can see it in full view, is this a life of someone that truly wants to be doing what they do? Be the one touched by the grace of God to touch the hearts of those that feel their unworthiness is what leads them to live in a way they feel is the only way. Be a leader and teach what you have learned so others to can walk with eyes fully open to the life of love and worthiness of all good.
0 comments:
Post a Comment